Isn't this the First World?
My German friend Edda visited this summer. At the end of a tasty lunch at the Cottonwood, I requested a doggie bag for the uneaten half of my spicy sandwich. I tell ya, Edda looked as if I'd just stomped on her schnitzel. Apparently in Germany, they don't take home their leftovers, a concept as astounding as it is grim.
That night I brought Edda to a dinner soiree at Ved's house. Little did she know she was about to act as mouthpiece for her ignorant, leftover-loathing "nation." We fired the questions fast and furious-
"Would they give me the stinkeye if I brought my own container from home?"
"Don't Germans ever order Chinese food or pizza?"
"Is it because your food is gross?"
"Do you have to eat every morsel, even if you're stuffed?"
"Isn't America better?"
The funny thing is, I was in such a state of shock that I can't remember a single one of her responses. All I'm left with is a lingering sense of pity.
posted by jesse @ 3:29 PM
7 Comments:
Actually, Germans don't "eat" in the traditional sense, like normal human beings. At night, after they return to the nest, their heads retract and expose a fleshy tube that goes straight to the pharynx. The queen then regurgitates insects and pancreatic juice into the tube.
LOL @ race gannon!!
YES- America IS better. You can take home left overs or not, and no social norm would be the wiser.
Germans are not as large as Americans and therefore eat less food, thus portions are smaller. Therefore the use of doggie bags for leftovers from big meals is not required :)
Mrs B....I was just being polite.....but Europeans generally eat less than Americans, and the food portions are definately bigger in the USA. When I'm in the US then I use the doggy bag, but it just not done over here. :)
Silly. Any excess nutriments are regurgitated back through the tube and stored in the community's peritoneal sac. These are Germans, remember? The engineering is superior to regular humans.
I'll tell you what. I'm up to my wazoo in Germans here. They clean their plates.
Also, they are really not down will cold drinks. I've started pulling bottles of water out of the fridge and letting them sit at room temperature. My Germans much prefer this. Everytime I ask for ice in their presence it is as if I have just run my nails down a chalkboard.
hi everybody. welcome.
Race- I'd watch it. That's the type of talk that gets you eaten by a pupating German.
b- It was your house. I am a bad man. You are a math whiz and an extraordinary chef. Future hubbies, take heed.
Kaysea- From sea to shining sea.
Haddock- I appreciate your insightful cross-culture commentary. However, I have a pleasant stereotype of chubby blonde Germans hoisting steins of beer and cramming their gullets with bratwurst. Please don't take that from me.
Cupcake- The topic of room-temperature water came up at Ms. B's house just last night. It seems some of my 'friends' prefer to leave their Britas on the counter rather than in a good old all-American fridge. Something smells a bit...German, wouldn't you say?
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